Celebrating 100 posts on narcissism, toxic personalities and healing — here’s an index so you can more easily find what you are looking for.
My Own Story
Why this blog is called But Now I Know Your Name
My experiences with a malignant narcissist, and what I learned
General Background
Why a Narcissist Can’t Change
The Red Flags of a Narcissistic Relationship
Narcissism Vocabulary
The Narcissists Self-Inflicted Troubles
The Myth That Narcissism is Self-Love
Understanding Narcissistic Abuse
Everyone is NOT Capable of Self-Awareness
Different Types of Narcissists
Different Types of Narcissists
Neglectful Narcissists
What is a Hobosexual?
How Narcissists Tend to Behave
Is it Fighting or Abuse?
How to know what a narcissist is really doing
How Aware is the Narcissist?
Your Value to the Narcissist
The Narcissist’s Mask
The Shallowness of the Narcissist
Living on Crumbs
Gaslighting
Being With a Narcissist is Like Being a Jenga Game
Testing You
The Hoover Stage of Abuse
Narcissistic Lies Are Like Rats
Future Faking
The Narcissist’s Rule Book
You’re Perfect, You’re Wonderful
10 Ways the Narcissist Devalues You
What is Narcissistic Supply?
Narcissistic Pettiness
Lack of Insight
Hitting You Where it Hurts
The Fauxpology
Narcissists are Empty Piggy Banks
A Stopped Clock is Right Twice a Day
Is Narcissistic Manipulation Conscious?
Choosy Beggars
Narcissism in Intimate Relationships / Dating
Why am I Googling Signs My Partner is a Narcissist?
Relationship Reality
Why It’s Ok to Go Slow
Co-Parenting with a Narcissist (guest blogger)
Green Flags of a New Relationship
Soul Mate or Mirroring?
What is Appropriate Interest?
The Narcissist’s Slippery Approach to Commitment
Narcissism in Family Systems
Family Pyramid Schemes
Were You Parentified?
What To Do if You Were Parentified
The All is Forgiven Holiday Trope
Narcissism in the Workplace
The Narcissist At Work
Sorry HR, Don’t Send Me Your Narcissist to Coach
Secondhand Smoke (a metaphor)
How Not To Hire a Narcissist
Info on Targets / Survivors of Narcissistic Abuse
Victim, Survivor, or Target?
Are Targets Co-Dependent?
The Trauma Bond
Facing the Truth
Cognitive Traps
Getting a PhD in Toxic Personalities
Going Against Your Own Values?
The Fawn Response to Abuse
What If I’M the Narcissist?
If Only I Hadn’t ___________
Do You Need to Forgive the Narcissist?
Why Not Needing Help Can Be a Trauma Response
Healing
Healing Part One
Climbing the Mountain of Healing
Your Window of Tolerance
Seeing the Forest
Being a Shame-Free Zone for Targets of Abuse
The Grey Rock Method
Designing an Alliance
The Complexity of Forgiveness
Letting Your “Snow Globe” Settle
Grieving What Never Was
10 Tips for Healing
What is Post-Traumatic Growth?
Coming Out of the Hurricane (guest blogger)
The Learning Steps and Healing
Cut Through Emotional Manipulation
Poetry
All the Broken Ones We Tried to Love
The Devil Doesn’t Advertise
This is Not Forever, Although It Is For Now
We Haven’t Said NO Enough
What Is It Then, To Heal?
The Important Role of Fear
The House of Love
Boundaries
Going Back to Who I Was
If I Could Give You One Thing
Our Sacred Light is Not For Sale
Don’t Give Your Treasure to the Bandits
Lost Again in a Familiar Place
If No One Asks You How You Are, You Learn to Say You’re Fine
A Blessing to Honor Ourselves
Embracing Discernment
Resources
10 Favorite Resources
Group Coaching Program
Songs for the Healing Journey
In the process of healing and need some support? Join our next group coaching program (starts January 2023) or Contact Ann for one-to-one coaching.
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Want to learn how to work with relational trauma as a coach? Join our next Certification Program for Neuroscience, Coaching and Relational Trauma starting January 2023.
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ABOUT THE AUTHOR
Ann Betz is the co-founder of BEabove Leadership and an expert on the intersection of neuroscience, coaching, trauma and human transformation. She speaks, trains and coaches internationally, and writes about neuroscience and coaching as well as relational trauma. Ann is also a published poet who loves cats, rain in the desert, and healthy relationships.
But Now I Know Your Name 